Reprinted from Saturday, October 15, 2011

My bear is a Horcrux.

Let me explain.

When I was 12, my family went on a vacation to Sequoia National Park. Stopping at a gift shop, our parents bought my brother and I these little stuffed toy black bears with tan muzzles called “Sierra Bears” on the label. I don’t know if they only existed in that gift shop or not, but I’ve never seen their like since. I named mine B.J. McBear and he named his Rex. For the rest of the trip they were our main form of entertainment as we created little squeaky voices for them, gave them personalities, and generally drove our parents crazy.

When we got home, the fun didn’t stop. I believe it started when my brother made a little Dukes of Hazard car out of a Kleenex box for Rex. I made one too and soon we were racing them along the linoleum floor and leaping them over the steps. One thing led to another and soon they had a small fleet of cardboard cars and a small selection of clothing. Then things got really cool.

I went through mom’s bag of fabric and made costumes. Bat Bear and Robin were born and needed a Batmobile, so more cardboard was consumed. Superbear needed no car, nor did Spider Bear, but they did need enemies. We only had the two stuffed animals so we recruited from my sister’s large selection to round out the cast.

Rex had a Lamborghini, so B.J. had to have one too. Tron came out so I built them light cycles, costumes and even a tank. Then came the helicopters. I made a gunship out of cardboard with a yard stick for the propeller. When that one crashed and broke, I made another. I made two versions of Airwolf from the TV series of the same name. Did the bears have flight suits and helmets? Oh, yes they did.

The stuffed animals and their friends appeared in the first comic book I ever did; an animal version of Disney’s Condorman. Just like the hero of the movie, I built all the stuff depicted in the comic book. Then there was the Return of the Jedi animal comic that I started on, but it was far more fun to play light saber duels with B.J. as Luke and my sister’s polar bear as Darth Vader. He was dressed all in black, complete with the mask and helmet, but he was pasty-white when you removed it, just like in the movie.

My bear was, among other things Indiana Jones, James Bond, Dracula, Rambo, the Mighty Thor, a ninja, Zorro, Doctor Who (#4 with scarf), Perseus from Clash of the Titans (and a Pegasus stuffed animal was added to the family), an astronaut, and of course, James T. Kirk. Every costume came with little props and whatever vehicles I needed for his adventures. The Star Trek crew had uniforms and an Enterprise bridge playset made of cardboard, complete with a revolving captain’s chair and interchangeable view screen. I even made Rex little pin-on felt pointed ears.

One of the last big projects I worked on was for Ghostbusters. B.J., Rex, and Pegasus (Peg) were the three main characters and they had costumes, proton packs and gadgets for catching ghosts. I sewed a stuffed “Slimer” ghost to chase around and made an Ecto-mobile with a sliding rack in the rear for the backpacks.

Only a few costumes remain, and none of the vehicles or playsets. The bear has traveled with me everywhere, sharing many adventures. I lived my life vicariously through him, even becoming good at animating him through puppetry. I can make almost any stuffed animal seem alive now. I instilled in B.J. McBear a little piece of my soul and childhood, and it remains there to this day. He and his friends sit on a shelf gathering dust, overlooking my bedroom, but every once in a while I will take them down, dust them off, and remember all the fun times we had. As long as B.J. is around, a part of me won’t die.

Just like Voldemort.

I did some vocal warmups by reading Smaug’s dialogue from ‘The Hobbit’ and decided to record it and play around a bit. The pitch is a tad lower, there’s reverb added, and some slowed-down grunting to make the sinister growling noise. It’s not high quality, but fun.

I realized I never shared the wonderful synth music provided by Apocalyptic Universe for my opening and ending credits, so here it is, complete with voiceovers. I found this fellow, or rather he found me, by chance. I posted on a Reddit board about finding a technological alternative to buying a license from a symphony orchestra for only 50 seconds of music, and he answered, saying he could compose or arrange some music for a what turned out to be a great price. The music is an arrangement of Gustav Mahler’s Symphony No. 1 in D major “Titan” II. Kräftig bewegt, doch nicht zu schnell (moving strongly, but not too quickly).

Enjoy!

I’ve got something embarrassing to admit. I paid to get a few reviews on Instagram. I figured since my usual attempts at advertising weren’t paying off, I’d spend a little money to get some views. Some one offered, so why not try it?
Because it’s all a scam, that’s why. They saw my recent promotional posts and decided to inundate me with review requests. I was fielding several a day, mostly saying, “no thank you, maybe next month,” but some I took just to see how it went, giving them the benefit of the doubt. Some were well-written, some looked like they were written by a concussed donkey, and no one read past the first chapter or two.
I asked other self-published authors about them, and I was told by one and all: SCAM. The proof was received after I blocked them. I got a threatening email from one scammer (who wanted to charge me $85 for a review and interview package) claiming that if I didn’t pay up, he and his “influencers” would give me 1 star reviews on Amazon, hounding me night and day until I paid up. Not gonna happen.

Long story short, if you are a writer and anyone offers to review your book for money, BLOCK THEM. Don’t even engage. I do this all the time with scam phone calls. At my job, I can recognize one in seconds. But I wanted to believe that some people were good, so I took a chance. Lesson learned.

P.S. I took a screenshot of the scammer’s threatening email, along with his other blocked email account. Always save the evidence.

Here are couple of samples from the upcoming audiobook version of The Gold Cat’s Daughter, narrated by the author. I hope you enjoy it! It was a lot of hard work. Whew.

From Chapter 8

From Chapter 9

Today I heard of open auditions for an ElfQuest audio drama and had to apply! ElfQuest is a beautiful, well-written comic book by Wendy Pini, and was my inspiration for making a comic book, which ultimately led to my novel writing. I read some audition sides, doing a couple versions of each.

Auditions for Treestump, Scouter, and Picknose:

Mark Rude-Treestump

Mark Rude-Scouter

Mark Rude-Picknose

Saruman and Gandalf having a friendly chat.
It’s difficult for me to do Ian McKellen’s softer voice without slipping into his louder tonals. Christopher Lee is a lot easier for me, which I guess is a good thing for a narrator.

I was screwing around while recording my audio books and did this. I learned how do get my voice to go really deep for a while, and I tweaked it with an echo effect. Then I found a breathing sound on YouTube and mixed that in. Enjoy.

The Cindra Corrina Chronicles began as an idea for a comic book entitled Passage, originally set in the years after Cindra’s training and early adventures, which would be revealed through flashbacks. This was in the dawn of the digital age of comics, and I was still doing things by the old How To books like The Complete Book of Cartooning by John Adkins Richardson, and the overly-long-named How To Draw and Sell Comic Strips for Newspapers and Comic Books! by Alan McKenzie. These were about the only guides available in the 1980’s and early 90’s, and while full of good information, they were written for a time when pencil and ink were the only mediums, and word bubbles were attached with scissors and glue. My first effort only saw a couple of mock-up printings, but I made a cool oil painting for the cover that has since disappeared. Neither copies remain, to my knowledge. In it, Cindra was an adult warrior, trained and deadly.

Later, when I learned more about paint programs and digital editing, I decided to revamp and redraw the story from a more interesting point, namely Cindra’s early years and ‘call to adventure’ that set her on her warrior path. I began to draw the movie that was playing in my head, knowing or caring little for comic book pacing and marketing. After printing three of the five issues I drew at over $3000 in printing fees, I decided that it was not the route for me. I did the math and figured if I put out books at my current rate, I would be done in my 80’s. So I shifted to novel writing.

One does not just shift to novel writing.

It is a learning process like any other, and a craft to be honed. I penned (typed) a short story that became the roots of a greater mythology and formed the backdrop for the main plot, then dove into Cindra’s adolescent adventures, earning my lumps along the way. I tried submitting to agents, perhaps two dozen, and while I got positive feedback, no one wanted my story. So I tried self-publishing once again. Things had changed since the comic book days; the Print On Demand and online shopping model made doing a novel series practical and cheap, especially since I could do all the art and non-writing work myself. Thus began my new career path, and I have enjoyed it thoroughly ever since. Every chapter has its own artwork, so a hint of that old comic book still lives in the pages of the Cindra Corrina Chronicles.